Thank Your Headache

In Victor Wooten’s 2008 novel, The Music Lesson, the student wakes up one morning with a headache. The teacher, after appearing, mysteriously tells him that he should thank his headache, rather than fight it. The student does, and the pain subsides.

It’s a wonderful book with bountiful wisdom, but that chapter has always stuck with me. The idea is that, rather than tense up when we feel pain, we should be mindful of what our bodies are trying to tell us. We should be grateful for the pain because it’s usually a warning about something that could turn into a more serious problem if ignored. Hence, thank you, headache.

I was reminded of that story as I drove home tonight with a dull pain behind my eyes. Rather than resist the headache, I acknowledged it and thanked my body for telling me something was wrong. In my case, I could tell I had stayed up too late and needed some sleep. I also noticed my shoulders were hunched and my jaw was clenched, so I breathed and let go of the tension that had creeped its way up my neck. When I did that, the pain didn’t go away completely, but it did subside quite a bit. The pain was my body’s way of getting my attention, and when I noticed and acknowledged what was wrong, it was as if my headache said, “OK, good. Just letting you know” and calmed down. Thank you, headache.

I know it sounds cheesy, but it works. The next time you have a headache, try thanking it instead of getting frustrated or annoyed by it. Listen to what it’s telling you. It might be saying, “Hey, you haven’t had any water today”, or “You should probably take a break from staring at this computer screen”, or “Don’t worry so much about this presentation”.

I like to think our bodies don’t just cause us pain for no reason. It’s more likely that they’re trying to tell us something. Of course, if you’re bleeding profusely, by all means get to a hospital. Otherwise, try taking a moment to listen and see if you can’t hear what the headache is saying.

Your mind and body work best when they’re on the same team.

Now, I’m off to bed. Have a great weekend!

If you enjoyed or benefitted from this article, please consider sharing it with the button below! Also, you should follow me on Twitter.

How I Stopped Working Out and Felt Better About Pretty Much Everything

I teach karate, for those of you who don’t know.

The chief instructors work out for two hours Monday and Wednesday, followed by a meeting that can last up to an hour. While I’m not a chief instructor, I was invited to these workouts, and subsequently have been participating for some time.

While I consider it a great privilege to attend these workouts, they put a significant strain on my Monday and Wednesday schedules. I get up at 9am, drive twenty-five minutes to Windsor, do the workout and meeting, and get home around 1:30. I need to be at my studio by 3pm to get ready for the day’s classes, which last until 9pm. That means I have a 90-minute window with which to take care of my entire non-karate life. Between showering, eating lunch, and posting something here, — not to mention my thesis — these twelve-hour days are pretty hectic.

Now, this schedule was counteracted by the fact that I didn’t teach on Tuesdays and Thursdays, which meant I’d have twelve-hour Mondays and Wednesdays, interspersed with leisurely Tuesdays and Thursdays. It sounds doable, but over time, the weight of Monday and Wednesday drove me to the point where I couldn’t find the motivation to do much of anything on my off days. All I wanted to do was rest.

This continued for many months, until, during a conversation about my thesis, my instructor reminded me that my attending the workouts and meetings was completely optional. If I wanted to spend a morning getting a chunk of writing done, it wouldn’t be a big deal.

I was conflicted, because I value the workouts themselves, but I could feel myself getting burnt out with my current schedule. One day, I decided to take the morning off to work on my thesis. That was probably three weeks ago, and I haven’t been up to Windsor since.

Cutting out those Monday/Wednesday workouts has had a profoundly positive impact on my mood and attitude. Here’s why:

1. I save gas. It may not seem like much, but twenty highway miles each way twice a week burns a decent amount of fuel. It’s only a few miles to the studio where I teach, so without the Windsor trips, my gas tank lasts exponentially longer. I don’t get paid to attend the workouts or meetings, so I also save a bit of money on gas.

2. I save time. Understandably, sometimes the workout is intense and worth the trip, and sometimes we’re off our game and it’s pretty unproductive. Including travel, workout, and meeting, I might use up to four hours of my day, hours that might be used more effectively elsewhere. That ninety-minute window gives me only enough time to get a handful of things done. With the morning free, I get much more done and go into work feeling accomplished, rather than frazzled.

3. I save stress. To be blunt, meetings usually put me in a bad mood, depending on the dynamic. In this case, even though the meetings are tailored for the chief instructors and not me specifically, I still felt obligated to participate and share the criticism when it came to discussing business areas we needed to improve. Long story short, I rarely felt energized or motivated after meetings, and more likely would feel pressured and stressed out. No longer.

4. I save energy. Two hours is a long workout, and teaching four classes afterward — which itself is respectable exercise — is pretty demanding. I like to work out hard, so being exhausted when teaching my own students decreased the quality of their classes. I’d have low energy, be more impatient, and more likely to get annoyed with a snarky eleven-year-old. Now, I’m working out in other ways, which leave me invigorated instead of exhausted. Instead of showing up at work fried, I can have a productive morning writing or getting things done, which leaves more energy for teaching stronger and more enjoyable classes.

5. I save sanity. The result of all this is that my mood is tremendously improved. I’m not exhausted from overtraining. I’m not stressed because I feel like I got nothing done. I’m not depressed about spending my entire day off being tired instead of productive. I’m not cranky when I teach my students. I come to work after a productive morning excited to teach class. Overall, I’m much better equipped to deal with life that day.

My point is this: sometimes you don’t realize the effect something has on you — for better or worse — until it’s not there anymore. It could be a meeting, a commute, or some other time-suck. It could be an object on your desk, or a pile of paperwork. It could be a relationship.

I didn’t fully understand how negatively my trips to Windsor were affecting me until I eliminated them. Only then did I realize how much better I felt. Sometimes the drawbacks outweigh the benefits.

Now, there are some things — most things — you can’t control. You can’t just stop doing your job, no matter how stressed out it makes you. (Although, you could quit.) But, it’s important that we remain aware of and examine the things we can control and change them when necessary.

If your commute involves a two-mile stretch of lights and stop-and-go traffic, then find a different way to get to work. I’ll always take a scenic, enjoyable route over a direct, but infuriating, one.

Have you been using a broken umbrella for months because you’re too lazy to buy a new one? BUY a new umbrella! You’re soaking wet all the time.

Are you sick and tired of tripping over the office garbage can every time you get up from your desk? Then MOVE the garbage can!

It sounds silly and obvious, but sometimes we become so acclimated to these annoyances, we don’t even notice them anymore. We just feel their effects. We don’t realize how little effort it would take to improve our lives in some small way. And usually it’s the little things that make a big difference.

If you enjoyed or benefitted from this article, please consider sharing it with the button below! Also, you should follow me on Twitter.

Walking to Music

It was an unbelievable 54 degrees today with nary a cloud in the sky, so I decided to go for a walk.

It was a respectable walk, something in the vicinity of 2.2 miles with moderately challenging terrain. I decided to bring my iPhone so I could listen to the new Gotye album, which is amazing. I’ll probably be writing about it shortly, so you might as well buy it now.

Meanwhile, on the last leg of my walk, it occurred to me that I hadn’t really thought about anything but the music. It brought to mind the debate between exercising with music or without. Suppose you’re going for a run, for example. I can see how the right music could pump you up and potentially lead to a stronger, more intense workout. But on the other hand, your mind could remain focused on the song, as I experienced today, and fail to drift aimlessly from thought to thought.

Activities like walking or running are great opportunities to let our minds relax and wander freely. You can let your worries go for a little while and surrender to the endorphins. It’s a good chance to decompress, think, or not think at all. Who knows where that mental wandering might lead? If I hadn’t been focused on the awesomeness of Gotye, maybe my mind would have come across a great idea for an article, or some other epiphany.

I can’t say which is better. That half-hour walk might have been boring without my headphones, or I might have come up with a new idea, or maybe I’d just have enjoyed the day a little bit more.

If you enjoyed or benefitted from this article, please consider sharing it with the button below! Also, you should follow me on Twitter.

Night Driving

Yesterday, I wrote about how we experience a heightened sense of emotion at night. Today, I’m going to talk about one of my favorite nighttime activities. Wink wink.

On Sunday nights, usually in an effort to stave off the blues, I like to go for a long drive and listen to music. I’ve been doing it ever since I got my license, and it remains one of my favorite things.

I figured out early on in my driving career, cruising around in my green 1995 Buick LeSabre, that being lost is largely a state of mind. I’d take a left even though I’d never taken that particular left before, and while it was a little unnerving, more often than not it led back to somewhere familiar. Since then, I’ve always reminded myself that as long as you keep driving, eventually you’ll get to where you want to be.

Still, I have a hard time articulating the value of night driving. It’s difficult to explain unless you’ve experienced it for yourself. Ultimately, it’s a source of catharsis, which grows out of the combination of factors I mentioned in yesterday’s post. I’ve always loved to drive, but driving at night is even better. There’s no traffic. You’re not rushing to get anywhere. Everything looks different in the dark. Your neighborhood becomes an entirely different world.

I have a particular route I use when I go driving at night, and it’s comprised mostly of places I don’t otherwise visit anymore. Past my high school, old friends’ houses, the local reservoir, roads I remember from when I was a little kid in the backseat looking out the window. It’s like I’m driving past a series of memories, little vignettes from earlier years.

Usually, this nostalgia actually causes me to reflect on the present. I think about people I don’t talk to anymore, which makes me think about and appreciate the people who do have a place in my life now. It’s very soothing and rarely fails to fill me with joy.

Travel and motion has long been associated with a calming, restorative energy. That’s why parents often take a crying infant for a ride in the car. When Neil Peart’s daughter and wife died, he got on his motorcycle and travelled 55,000 miles from Quebec to Alaska, then south through the United States to Belize. Because of this four-year journey, he was able to come back from the brink of moral collapse.

When you combine the night’s heightened state of emotion with the soothing qualities of driving, you get an incredibly cathartic activity. There’s a feeling of freedom and excitement for life. Everything’s beautiful. With an empty road, the right album, and nowhere particular to go, you can find great comfort.

If you enjoyed or benefitted from this article, please consider sharing it with the button below!

The Power of Night

When I was little, I used to freak out if I was the only one awake in my house. Being alone in the dark is scary for a kid. These days, though, I’ve come to appreciate it.

If left to my own devices, I could probably become completely nocturnal in about two days. I love staying up late, and I could sleep until noon every day if my schedule allowed. I’ve never been a morning person and find the moment my alarm goes off to be excruciating. Those of you who blink twice and spring out of bed with a cheerful, “Good morning!”, please keep your voice down while I remove the welding from my eyes.

I do, however, have a certain affinity for the dawn. Getting up for it is hellish, but five o’clock in the morning is an incredible time of day. You just have to get to it. For me, that usually means staying up all night — and then sleeping in, of course.

People always allow themselves to feel guilty about sleeping late. “I feel like I wasted my whole day!” Or, if they’re tough, they’ll say, “I’ll sleep when I’m dead!” I never understood that line of thinking. For one, you’ll die a lot sooner if you don’t get your sleep, and two, all you have to do is stay up later. Boom. Hours regained.

I appreciate vitamin D as much as the next person, but I’ve always found nighttime to be preferable to daytime. There’s no traffic. It’s quiet. In the summer, it’s much cooler. You’re probably not rushing to get anywhere, so it’s more relaxing. You see things differently in the dark. It’s a different world. It’s a world at rest.

There’s also a special benefit. All of these qualities contribute to a sense of heightened emotion.

Have you ever noticed how emotions are way more intense at night? Whatever you’re feeling seems to increase tenfold. That’s because we are more likely to find ourselves alone with our thoughts at night. During the day, we’re all running around, doing our jobs, talking to each other, trying to get things done. It’s easy to suppress our emotions when we’re busy and have life to distract us. But at night, when the world slows down, and everyone is asleep but you, the only company you have is your mind. Your emotions become much bigger and more powerful because they’re being amplified by solitude. It’s hard to ignore them when everything else is so quiet.

Maybe it’s the introvert in me, but I value this time. It’s a great opportunity to practice mindfulness. You can wrestle with feelings, contemplate the unknown, or appreciate something or someone in your life. With no one around, you can give something your full attention. You can focus all your energy into a single thought or project. I’m writing this article at two in the morning, for example. It’s hard to find such opportunity during the day.

It works both ways, of course. Being alone in the dark when you’re happy can be liberating, but when you’re sad, it can be miserable. In either case, though, we should remember to take advantage of the heightened awareness the night provides. It’s a wonderfully cathartic environment. It’s the perfect time to get to know yourself a little better. To sit still, be quiet, and just think. Your mind might teach you things you missed while running around in the sun.

If you enjoyed or benefitted from this article, please consider sharing it with the button below!

The QLE Informational Brochure & FAQ

Note: This is a long post. However, I think it's worth your time because it will help you decide whether you should stay or leave and never come back. You can't lose.

The other day, I had dinner with my mom, and we got to talking about my website. (This one.) She loves me, as moms do, so she was interested in what I had been up to, how the site was going, and what it all sort of... meant. So, I talked my way through my vision for the site, what I'm trying to do, who it's for, and several other questions that felt good to answer out loud.

During this conversation, it occurred to me that I haven't really provided you, dear reader, with an in-depth explanation of what's actually going on here. I wrote a post called What Is Inner Peace?, which sheds a little light on things, but I treat the site as an organic endeavor. It might not mean the same thing in three years as it does now. The focus will most likely grow and change as I do.

The Story So Far

I'm pretty proud of what the site has become in its first seven months. It feels like a real thing now. The first six months saw me testing the waters. Would I like blogging every day? Is this worth my time? Can I actually do this? I'm thrilled to answer "yes" to all of the above. It's been a challenge, but I want and am trying to kick things into high gear around here. I'm writing more stuff, pushing the site more than I used to, and starting to introduce myself to other writers, all of whom I admire and respect a great deal. It's slow, but steady, and also really exciting.

2012 is barely a month old, but QLE is already occupying much of my time and attention. I'm writing more than I ever have before — probably even more than I did in college — and it's all stuff I want to write and share with people. The site is taking up more space in my brain. Thinking about QLE is starting to become a habit. I'm thinking of what I want to write next, and even when I'm doing other things, I can feel it in the back of my head somewhere. It feels really good. The site is still young, but I'm beginning to get the sense that I can do this. It's been seven months; why stop now? As long as you don't give up, you can do anything, right? So they say.

I think I'm also starting to look outward a bit more. I'm starting to think about my readers: what you might want to read, and what might help you get through your day. I'm getting a better idea of what I want QLE to mean and do for people — at least, in its current incarnation. When someone visits the site for the first time, they're going to see an article on who knows what, so I want to take a few minute to really dig into what I want this site to be. And what better question to start with than:

What is "Quarter-Life Enlightenment"?

Quarter-Life Enlightenment is the answer to the quarter-life crisis.

What's a "quarter-life crisis"?

A quarter-life crisis is just like a midlife crisis, except it happens in your twenties instead of on your fiftieth birthday. Upon turning fifty, some people — and I mean this is the most compassionate possible way — freak out a little bit. When you turn fifty, your life is probably at least half over! When you realize this, you start second guessing your entire life.

What have I accomplished so far? What do I have to show for myself? There are still so many things I want to do. I'm running out of time. Who am I?! AHHHHH!

To put it bluntly, the ultimate source of the mid-life crisis is (the fear of) death. We realize we've already used up half of our allotted time on Earth, and that's terrifying. No doubt about it.

Now, if you're paying close attention, you may be asking, "But twenty-somethings don't really think about death like that, so how is a quarter-life crisis 'just like a mid-life crisis?'" A fine question befitting an attractive reader like yourself.

The quarter-life crisis is not caused by a fear of death so much as it is driven by a fear of adulthood and The Real World (not the reality television show).

In my experience, the quarter-life crisis tends to come crashing down right after graduating from college. College, of course, is often — and accurately — described as "the best years of your life". Whomever said that about high school should get checked out.

When the blissful bubble of college bursts (two English degrees at work right there), we find ourselves on the doorstep of cold, hard reality facing real world pressures. And there are a lot of them.

"What do you want to do?"

"When are you going to get a job?"

"When are you going to get your own place?"

"When are you going to start paying off the thousands and thousands of dollars you spent on a degree (or two) that so far has only rendered you unemployed and in egregious debt?"

"When are you going to meet the love of your life?"

"When are you going to hurry up and be the adult the world expects you to be?"

I don't know.

The only thing worse than being bombarded with huge life questions is being unable to answer them. And what's more, now you start asking yourself questions:

What have I accomplished so far? A degree like everyone else. What do I have to show for myself? Thousands of dollars in debt. There are so many things I want to do, but I don't know how to do them or where to start. What am I going to do for the rest of my life? Who the hell am I?! AHHHH!

It's rough. Your friends aren't down the hall anymore. Your responsibilities don't fit in a backpack. The job market is as terrifying as everyone said it would be. It's a drastic departure from the best years of your life.

Now, I'm not trying to paint an inescapably bleak picture here. Plenty of people (I'm told) get great jobs right after college and go on to lead perfectly normal existences. But even these twenty-somethings are not without fears and doubts about their future. And, there's an even bigger issue.

You're better than that.

What if you're not content with normal?

What if you don't want to work in a cubicle, or wear a tie, or do the same damn thing in the same damn building for eight hours every single day?

What if you want to find fulfillment elsewhere?

What if you want to be exceptional and lead a life befitting your awesomeness?

Well, then I applaud you, sir or madam. You've probably made things even more challenging for yourself, but I applaud you all the same.

So, what do we do?

We stick together!

No, but seriously. I'm not in a position to help you become an entrepreneur, or travel the globe, or invent something better than Facebook (it's called Twitter, AMIRIGHT) because frankly, I need just as much help as you do. That's why I've repeatedly said that my writing here is advice to myself just as much as it is advise to you. I do not claim to be an expert in your happiness. I am merely here to share what works for me in the hopes that maybe it will work for you too, and vice-versa. We think, we learn, and we work through it.

Now, about that tagline...

"Finding inner peace through simplicity, technology, and other means."

Right. Inner peace is the solution to any crisis. Mine happens to be of the quarter-life variety. To quote my own personal definition of inner peace:

It’s the goal. The ideal state of being. It’s what everyone wants. Inner peace means being perfectly content, mentally, physically, emotionally. You have no fears. No worries. You have no wants, needs, or desires. No stress. No anxiety. No troubles. No fear. You just are. It can perhaps be considered an enlightened state.

I write about how I achieve inner peace so that you can too.

The ways I reach a state of inner peace are numerous and varied:

• Simplicity, because "Life is really simple, but we insist on making it complicated." Confucious said that.
• Technology, because it's a wonderful and amazing thing, and it's better to embrace it than try to avoid it.
• Perspective, because the only thing we can truly control is our minds and how they deal with what life throws at us.
• Writing, because I love it, and it's how I learn about myself. It's introspective, therapeutic, and really freaking hard.
• Other means, because there's always more than one right way.

I could write another thousand words about each of those things, but it's late, and you probably have things to do.

So, what IS Quarter-Life Enlightenment?

It's a way of beating the quarter-life crisis through inner peace and self-discovery. It's about introspection, figuring out who you are, and learning how to deal with life through trial and error. It's about being mindful. It's about making sure you know the answers to those questions on your fiftieth birthday. It's about tweaking your brain so that life isn't so damn stressful and hard all the time. It's about having a healthy outlook on life during good times and crappy times. It's about this quote:

You must love yourself before you love another. By accepting yourself and fully being what you are, your simple presence can make others happy.

Quarter-Life Enlightenment is about being who you really are.

If you want to beat the quarter-life crisis; if you want to beat any crisis; if you want to have inner peace; if you want to be calmer, more productive, and happier; if you want to learn how to not be miserable all the time; if you just want some company; I invite you to read Quarter-Life Enlightenment. I would love to have you.

Some final questions:

So, is this site only for quarter-aged people?

Most certainly not. That's the perspective I'm writing from, of course, but anyone who deals with stress and worry is more than welcome to read QLE. That is, any and all members of the human race.

Are you going to change the name of the site when you're not in your twenties anymore?

I do not know.

This whole "enlightenment" thing creeps me out. Is that some weird hippy thing?

No, it's whatever you want it to be. Here's a quick dictionary definition of "enlightened": "having or showing a rational, modern, and well-informed outlook". Sounds good to me.

I have feedback or a question.

Awesome! Ping me on Twitter, or send an email to inbox@andrewmarvin.net.

This has only made me more confused. Can you explain more about ___?

I am so sorry. Yes, absolutely. Get in touch with me, and we'll sort things out.

How'd you come up with this?

That's a story best told in person, but the short version is: I gave a presentation at Southern Connecticut State University about simplicity, and people really seemed to like it. I have two English degrees, and I love to write, so I thought I'd start writing about things I care about and that also seem to help other people.

I'm floored by your writing/website/message/boyish good looks. Are you available to come speak at my school/organization/place of work?

Yes; it would be a genuine honor. I'll be working out more details about this sort of thing later in the year, so in the meantime, get in touch.

Where can I learn more about Andrew Marvin? What's he all about?

I'd start with the About page. If that doesn't completely stultify you, feel free to send me an email.

You're obsessed with The Long Winters. Can you please stop talking about them?

I can't promise anything. Sorry to lose you as a reader. Also, shame on you.

Apple sucks!

That's not a question, but alright.

Has anyone ever actually read all of these?

I can't imagine, no.

What do I get for reading the entire thing?

My sincerest thanks.

Getting It Wrong the First Time

In elementary school, all of my teachers seemed to have the same poster, detailing the Ten Rules of the Classroom. I only remember the first two: “Follow directions the first time given” and “Keep hands, feet, and objects to yourself”. Being the little nerd that I was, I was pretty good at following rules, but I always prided myself on that first one. I was damn good at following directions the first time given, mostly because I hated getting in trouble. I still am, and I still do.

Sixteen years of martial arts training has further taught me the importance of following directions, or more accurately, the value of precision and attention to detail. I frequently tell my students that an attention to detail is what separates an average martial artist from a great one. You need to know if that’s supposed to be a back punch or a thrust punch. You need to know how your weight should be distributed in a certain stance. You need to know what part of your foot you’re using to kick the imaginary bad guy in the face. These things matter. It’s the difference between an effective kick and broken toes.

Recently, I was given the opportunity to contribute a guest post to another website, the author of which I respect very much. I was thrilled and grateful. I labored over my article — writing, reading, rewriting, rereading — wanting, as I always do, to get it right the first time.

Eventually I was satisfied and sent it off. I was proud of what I had written and excited to share it with others. I got a response back a little while later with his feedback, and my heart sank a little.

I got it wrong.

I opened the email, and I winced as my eyes glossed over a few critical phrases. Nothing mean, of course, but what I had written wasn’t what he was looking for. I had missed the point, even though I didn’t quite understand how.

After a moment, I realized that the way I reacted to this criticism was crucial. I could have been argumentative. I could have been defensive. No one likes to be criticized, and I knew my piece was good.

But I also knew that taking this feedback graciously was the only way to get better. Not only would it make my article better, but it would make me a better writer. My piece was, for all intents and purposes, well-written. It just wasn’t what he was looking for. I hadn’t followed directions. And not intentionally, either.

I wrote back with some questions, explaining what I was struggling with and emphasizing that I wanted to try again. I wanted to get it right. He sent me back an additional explanation, and it completely elucidated what I had missed. Now, I understood. It felt good, as it always does, to struggle with something and have it finally click.

At the bottom of his email, he wrote something that surprised me. He thanked me for working with him on the article, and he said, “This is the work that writers do.”

That really stuck with me. It was a great lesson on working to deliver what the client wants, even if that means rewriting the entire thing, which I did. A lot of writing is rewriting. It was a valuable lesson in following directions. I’m grateful for the criticism and the experience. Sometimes getting it right the second time teaches us more than getting it right the first time. I ended up writing twice as much, but that’s a good thing. Writers write. The more the better.

How I Remove Friction from Writing

Aaron Mahnke has a great post on Frictionless Writing:

Any place I can find friction, and remove it, is an area of my life or business that I can push closer to my goals. So naturally, I am constantly on the lookout for ways to smooth my processes and methods for doing things. And my writing time is no different. Over the years I have gathered a number of helpful tips for making the writing process as smooth and frictionless as possible

I think about this concept often. As I wrote in a recent post, the easier it is to start writing, the better the chance of writing actually taking place. Writing could be as simple as opening a new document on your computer, but sometimes even that seems like a lot of work. So the goal is to make that process as simple as possible. For example, I use Alfred to launch Byword (a very frictionless text editor) in just a couple of keystrokes. It's easier than going down to my dock or into the Finder to double click on an application. Those few seconds often make a big difference.

Capture

Aaron divides his frictionless writing process into three areas, the first of which is Capture. After reading Getting Things Done by David Allen, I realized how important it is to be able to capture any idea — no matter how small — in the moment. It frees you from trying to remember things, which keeps your brain clear, calm, and relaxed.

My iPhone is always within arm's reach, so I often capture ideas in Omnifocus or Notesy. I also just started playing with Noted!, an app I found via Patrick Rhone. It lets you instantly type and email a note to yourself, which works well for me. I keep my inbox empty as much as possible, so if there's something in there, it means something needs my attention. I'll often email a tweet to myself if it contains a link I don't have time to check out at the time. I'm always going to check my email, so putting things there is a good way to ensure I don't miss anything.

I bought my first pack of Field Notes late last year. They're great, but I haven't yet developed the habit of carrying one with me all the time. I'm torn between keeping my pockets empty and being able to jot something down freehand. Carrying a notebook also means carrying a pen, so I have to give it some more thought. I'm leaning towards carrying one though.

Speaking of writing freehand, I also keep a scratchpad next to my computer, which is great for capturing random thoughts, making lists, and outlining posts while I'm at my desk.

I usually get ideas when I'm reading my RSS feeds in Reeder. I always get my feeds down to zero every couple of days, so when I come across something that I want to link to/write about, I just keep it unread until I have time to do so.

Manage

Management, Aaron's second aspect of frictionless writing, is probably my least systemized. All of my writing for this website is stored in a single folder in Dropbox. Link posts are named in a "Link - Author Title" format, while my original pieces are named with their title.

Now that I think about it, practically everything on my computer is stored in Dropbox. I've yet to setup a proper backup solution, but if my computer did spontaneously combust, all of my documents would be retrievable via Dropbox. My passwords and software information is stored in 1Password, and most of my apps are from the Mac App Store and easy to redownload. All of my music is kept on an external hard drive and is synced with iCloud/iTunes Match. I'm not a huge picture or video guy, but I suppose I do need a backup plan for those. At some point, I'll buy a second external hard drive and make copies with SuperDuper. According to DaisyDisk, I'm only using 47 GB of my MacBook Pro's 250 GB hard drive, and I could probably stand to clear some stuff out. Good to know when buying my next Mac.

Prioritize

Aaron concludes with the importance of Prioritization:

So after finding the best method for capturing your ideas, and building the right system for managing all of it, the final key is to install a sense of urgency and priority around our ideas. To grow as a writer, it is important to write. And it is easier to sit down to write with a nicely collected tome of ideas and sketches than it is when you can’t remember the great ideas you know you’ve lost.

This is something I've been trying to focus on in the new year, especially as I try to write more original pieces for the site. Writing something of my own Monday through Friday is a challenge, but the thrill of hitting Publish and sharing it with others is incredibly rewarding and worth it. But, my publishing goal also means I can't afford to skimp on my capture or management systems. If my system makes it easy to lose ideas, writing becomes much harder. Any stray thought could develop into a great idea, which could turn into a strong post. As such, I need to minimize the risk of losing my ideas by being able to capture and manage my thoughts quickly and easily.

The systems I have in place seem to be working pretty well so far, but I'll undoubtedly continue to tinker and refine them as time goes on. Writing is hard work, so like Aaron, my biggest focus is to make it as frictionless as possible. The easier it is to get ideas out of my head and onto my computer screen, the more likely others will get to read them.

"Blue in the broad light of day"

Yesterday, I called The Long Winters the band you need to know. Today, I’ll discuss the album I’d recommend starting with. Although I love all of The Long Winters’ records, this was the first one I heard. If you hate The Long Winters, we’ll be back to our regularly scheduled program tomorrow. Also, shame on you.

The Long Winters’ 2006 effort, Putting the Days to Bed, sat quietly on my iPod for almost four years before it became one of my most treasured albums. It encompasses everything that makes the band — and music in general — such a joy to listen to: catchy melodies, honest lyrics, and ultimately, a sense that no matter what you’re going through, everything is going to be OK.  

With eleven tracks totaling just 38 minutes, Putting the Days to Bed is a concise, yet highly memorable, indie rock record. The longest song is barely over four minutes, but rest assured, the album’s brevity belies the depth found within every song. A paragon of its genre, Putting the Days to Bed makes a brilliant addition to any music collection.

John Roderick’s lyrical prowess sits atop a long list of reasons why I love The Long Winters. As I took notes for this article during what must have been my hundredth listen, I found myself wanting to write down almost every line. It’s not just the words themselves that are great, but also the way they are delivered. Putting the Days to Bed is full of wonderful lines begging to be sung at full volume.  

Like me, I’m willing to bet you won’t be able to decide on a favorite. It might be the horn-backed triumph of “Teaspoon” (I know I wasn’t made to play on a team), or the guarded cries of “Hindsight” (I’m bailing water and bailing water because I like the shape of the boat).

Other days, you might prefer the cynicism of “Rich Wife” (Now tell me, is your high horse getting a little hard to ride?), or the quiet longing of “Seven” (Distance helps me only so much…).

Personally, I always come back to the upbeat vulnerability of “Ultimatum” (I hope I can keep seeing you just as long as you don’t say you’re falling in love). I could pour over each song line by line, but that’s a journey best taken on your own. We’ll compare notes when you’re ready.  

You could argue that Putting the Days to Bed is an exercise in heartbreak, and in a way, you’d be correct. None of the romances here seem destined to succeed. In fact, many are already a thing of the past. But, if all you had was the music, the singer’s plight would probably go unnoticed. Despite its lyrics, this album is soaring, infectious, and will have you rocking out within seconds of pushing PLAY. That’s what makes Putting the Days to Bed such a wonderful paradox. These are celebratory songs about broken hearts, and the result is a cathartic journey designed to lead us out of dark places. 

I often find myself thinking no matter how tough life gets, it’s hard to feel down as long as music exists. Putting the Days to Bed may feature the anguished lover, but the music reminds us not to forget just how incredible life is, heartbreak and all. There may be pain in the moment, but this is an album that encourages us to sing and dance our way through both the best and worst of times. It tells us to look at the big picture and find the comfort and beauty that resides there. What seems to be an exercise in heartbreak, then, is really a lesson in perspective. That’s what makes Putting the Days to Bed required listening. It shows us that, as painful as love can be, it’s a beautiful thing all the same.  

You can buy Putting the Days to Bed on iTunes.

The Band You Need to Know

Note: I’d been meaning to write this post for a few days, but it was Randy Murray’s Writing Assignment for January 13, 2012 that helped me get it done. Thanks, Randy!

Every once in a while, a band comes along and becomes the object of my obsession. Suddenly, their music fills my life and changes it for the better. I devour the entire discography, pour over their lyrics, and wake up with their songs in my head. This music is just… incredible.

The Long Winters are one of those bands.

Ironically, no article has given me writer’s block like this one. I adore this band, but I almost can’t articulate why. It’s hard not to resort to gushing about each and every song. This is music that keeps me up at night because I’d rather keep listening than go to sleep.

There are many things that make The Long Winters great, but for your sake, I’ll only pick three.

First, The Long Winters succeed at walking a very fine line, and that is being accessible without sacrificing depth. Rest assured, these are radio-friendly songs. Most fall in the three- or four-minute range, and they are catchy. But, that doesn’t make the band another source of shallow pop music. Rather, each song is a gem: small enough to fit in your pocket, but precious enough to take with you wherever you go.

Second, the lyrics. Lyrics are very important to some people, to the point where they can’t enjoy music without them. I’m happy to say that whether you’re a lyrics person or not, The Long Winters will speak to you. John Roderick is a master songwriter, and his lines are written for you, the listener. Somehow, he knows what you’ve been through. He knows what you’re feeling, and he’s felt the same way. That’s the only explanation for the honesty — the humanity — behind John’s words.

Finally, comfort. The Long Winters have guided me through heartbreak, lifted me out of depression, and made me realize that even in darkness, life remains amazing.

I’m reminded of a favorite quote by Aldous Huxley:

After silence, that which comes nearest to expressing the inexpressible is music.

The Long Winters prove this fact. Over the course of their two-and-a-half-hour discography, you will discover many moments of musical catharsis. This is music that will have you singing along at the top of your lungs, whether it’s with a smile on your face or tears in your eyes.

I’m not going to tell you my favorite songs for two reasons. One, The Long Winters’ albums stand strong in their entirety. These are records that can and should be enjoyed from start to finish, and not needing to hit SKIP is a hallmark of any great band. Two, my favorite songs may not be your favorite songs. Music speaks to us in ways too diverse to mention, and only you can figure out what songs make you sing the loudest.

Truly, there’s no better time to become a fan of The Long Winters. Their last album, Putting the Days to Bed, was released in 2006, and John Roderick seems to be hinting that we might finally see its long-awaited follow-up this year. Furthermore, you can get The Long Winters’ entire discography on iTunes for less than forty bucks. A small investment for a lifetime of enjoyment.

I can’t guarantee you’ll love The Long Winters like I do, but I can promise you have nothing to lose. Your ears and heart, however, have everything to gain.

On Being Almost Done

I had a meeting with my advisor (Hi, Dr. McBrine.) to discuss my thesis, which you may or may not know is on Middle English lyric poetry. At the time, I had sent him about 35 pages of solid criticism — the bulk of a fifty-page master’s thesis. The consensus was that the work I had done so far was very good. After months of reading, researching, and writing, such positive feedback was music to my ears. The hard part, my advisor declared, was over. All that was left to do was write my introduction and conclusion and tie it all together. I was almost done.

That was a month ago.

One month later, I’m still almost done, but I’m not any closer to actually being done than I was before the holidays.

I am paralyzed on the brink of achievement.

In some ways, it doesn’t make any sense. Just finish the damn thing! But, unfortunately, procrastination is persistent. There are a couple of reasons why I’ve failed to make any progress as of late. The first is that those initial 35 pages were hard work, and I clearly interpreted advisor’s generous feedback as, “Great job. You deserve a break.” Wrong, of course, but I’m only human.

The second and bigger reason is the concept of “almost done” itself.

Being almost done is exciting, but it also makes it much easier to come up with excuses for not finishing. “I’m almost done!” becomes “Eh, it’s almost done… I can finish it anytime.” Any time that’s not now, of course.

The brink of achievement is a precarious place. On one hand, most of the stress is gone. The hard part’s over. What once was an intimidating behemoth is now just a handful of leftover pages that need to be written. But on the other hand, less stress also means less motivation. In my case, having an entire thesis hanging over my head was excruciating. It drove me to power through in hopes of removing that pressure. Being almost done, however, means that my thesis is no longer a big deal. I’m not worried about it. Because it’s almost done.

Almost.

That “almost” is a killer. It’s a splinter in the back of my mind. A much smaller splinter than it once was, but a splinter all the same. My thesis is still there, waiting to be finished off. And so it shall.

The only way out is through.

Obviously, I have no intention of going through life with an almost done thesis on Middle English lyric poetry in my back pocket. The time has come to finish the job.

How?

Discipline and perspective.

I’m writing this Wednesday night, so my Thursday is reserved free and clear. Time to dig in. Fifty minutes on, ten minutes off. Repeat until lunchtime. Then hit it again until yoga. I recommend the BreakTime app.

What’s even more important is to think of the thesis — or any horrifying task — not as a To-Do, but as what Merlin Mann calls a To-Have-Done. That is, think not about how much it’s going to hurt to do the thing, but rather about how good it’s going to feel when it’s done. That shift in thinking makes it much easier to get started. Or get finished, as it were.

I’m not looking forward to working on my thesis for six or eight hours, but I am looking forward to being six or eight hours closer to done at the end of the day.

It’s time to own this thing. Soon it’ll be just a memory, and I can’t think of anything sweeter.

The Internet Is Amazing.

I want to take a moment to point out just how awesome the Internet is. The number of amazing people making cool stuff on the Internet makes me giddy. I aspire to be counted among them.

Here are a few things I’ve come across recently:

• Aquarium Drunkard, which describes itself as “an eclectic, independent audio blog featuring daily music, reviews, features, MP3s, sessions, interviews and more.” It’s already introduced me to several new artists. See: Junior Parker’s 1971 cover of Tomorrow Never Knows, and Henri Texier’s Les “là-bas” from his 1977 album Varech. Astounding. I found Aquarium Drunkard through the DMBTabs message board. Thanks, Mikey.

• AlfredTweet, which I found via Federico Viticci, is a nifty little script that allows you to interact with Twitter via Alfred. You can tweet, follow/unfollow, and read tweets and DMs with only a few keystrokes. Also, if you’re not using Alfred, you should get on that.

• You should watch this insane video of 30 giant Japanese hornets slaughtering 30,000 European honeybees. It was brought to my attention by Jason Kottke, whose job is to essentially find and share incredible things on the Internet. Amazing!

• I love this quote by Neven Mrgan: “Wake up unable to stop thinking about the awesome thing you’re working on.” It’s profound. That’s the life I want to live.

• This is a funny video called His Name Is James Bond. It made me laugh out loud, which I rarely do while perusing the Internet. Brought to you via Steven Ringo, who was retweeted by John Gruber.

With the new year, I’ve resolved to make QLE primarily a place for my own long-form, serious-esque writing. Still, I want you to know about fantastic things like those above. So, I collect all the cool things I find at andrewmarvin.tumblr.com. It’s updated daily, so be sure to subscribe. Useful and awesome stuff abounds.

Emotionally Responsible

Randy Murray in Emotionally Contagious:

Your emotions can and will carry over to the others that surround you. And theirs to you. Be aware of it. Your anger and frustration will breed it in others. Don’t contaminate your friends and family with it. If you sneezed, you’d cover your mouth. Do the same thing for your negative emotions. It won’t do you any good to blast your anger all around you. And it will do others harm.

I like this a lot.

As far as our planet is concerned, we are in charge. No corporeal creature reigns over human beings here. It’s just us. When we look around, so much of the world is the result of our actions. Buildings. Cars. Money. These are things not found in nature. They are here because we put them here.

We decided so much, and I’m not sure it’s all in our best interest. We decided we needed to work eight hours a day. We decided college needed to cost tens of thousands of dollars. We decided big houses and fancy cars are symbols of success. Things are the way they are because we made it so.

I’m reminded of this quote by Steve Jobs (see the video here):

When you grow up you tend to get told the world is the way it is, and your life is just to live your life inside the world. Try not to bash into the walls too much. Try to have a nice family life, have fun, save a little money.

That’s a very limited life. Life can be much broader once you discover one simple fact. And that is, everything around you that you call “life” was made up by people that were no smarter than you. And you can change it, you can influence it, you can build your own things that other people can use.

Once you learn that, you’ll never be the same again.

I like to think that we are responsible not just for the buildings and cars, but also for the energy our planet exudes. That is, the “life” we made up includes everything from physical inventions to our own emotions. We are responsible for all of it.

If we assume an Earth without human beings is a world that exists in a state of natural harmony in accordance with the rest of the universe, then we, as the most sentient of creatures, are responsible for the continuation or disruption of that harmony. We produce not only physical creations, but also metaphysical energy in the form of emotions. Joy. Hatred. Humor. Jealousy. Malice. Pride. These are the byproducts of humanity. Negative energy exists because we allow it to exist. Because we create it. When we choose to fight and compete with one another, we choose to contribute negative energy to the universe. We project it onto each other and off into space.

Like Randy says, emotion — and therefore, energy — is contagious. A healthy person can become ill by being around sick people, but who says a sick person can’t feel better by being surrounded by healthy people? Similarly, enough negativity can drag down even the best of spirits. Why can’t the reverse be true?

Attempting to alter the entire universe’s energy is too big a task for a single person. Our personal energies and emotions, however, are entirely within our control. I’ll worry about me, and you worry about you.

The universe’s collective energy is a matter of individual responsibility.

We each must ask ourselves, “What kind of energy will I project out into the universe today?”

Game Over, iPhone

I’m a proponent of removing clutter. A clean workspace, physical or digital, helps reduce stress by eliminating distractions and adding lightness to your day. When the weight of clutter is removed from your desk, it’s also removed from your mind. Clean is calm.

With that in mind, I’ve decided to take a drastic step and delete the Games folder on my iPhone.

Going game-less on the iPhone is something Stephen Hackett has talked about on his site, 512 Pixels. I touched on it, but only recently have I decided to adopt Stephen’s thinking.

iOS is a terrific gaming platform, and there are many fun and beautifully designed games out there. But, in the four years I’ve owned an iPhone, there’s never been a game that has held my attention for very long. Maybe a month, if I was playing it with a friend, but such games are rare. Even ports of games I loved as a child, like Mega Man and Chrono Trigger, go mostly unplayed after the first couple of days.

So, I’ve decided to try getting rid of them, and I think the benefits will outweigh the consequences.

1. No games = more space. Some games are pretty large and take up quite a bit of room on my phone. This isn’t a huge problem because I own a 32GB model iPhone 4, but now that iCloud is in full effect, I’m keeping more and more music on my phone instead of a separate iPod. There’s simply no reason to take up valuable space with unused apps, games included.

2. No games = save money. I know: most iOS games are a couple of bucks at the most, but those dollars add up. According to iTunes, I’ve downloaded 240 apps since I got my first iPhone circa 2008. Some of those were free, but some of them were $4.99 or more. If I don’t have a Games folder on my iPhone, I’ll hesitate before buying any new games, especially since I can’t stand the thought of a folder with only two apps in it.

3. No games = more productive. As I said, I’d rarely play the games on my iPhone, so it’s not like they were preventing me from getting things done. However, sometimes I’d choose a mindless game over doing something more useful, like reading an article in my Instapaper queue. Some may argue that it’s good to mindlessly play a game for a few minutes during a work or study break, but I think reading — or even not looking at a screen at all — is far more relaxing.

4. No games = guilt-free. Most would argue that games don’t have feelings, but it’s hard not to feel bad about never playing that $9.99 5-star role-playing game you splurged on two weeks ago. Gone are those negative feelings; every little bit helps.

I’m probably going to personally offend a few friends with this decision, so let’s call it an experiment for now. I’m keeping the games on my iPad for the time being, since its larger screen is better suited for playing. As for my iPhone, unless the greatest game of all time becomes available for iOS, I can’t imagine I’ll miss my old Games folder. Although, if that day comes, I might have to give it a spot on my home screen.

Seize the Spontaneity

Sometimes, the things we know are best for us are the things we find hardest to do. With the new year, we find ourselves saying, “I want to write more”, or “I want to exercise more”, or “I want to floss more”. But these things are hard, and sometimes the motivation to just do the thing is elusive.

One component of what makes these activities difficult is that they often have intrinsic barriers to starting. With writing, you have to be at your computer and open a new document. With exercising, you have to put on your workout clothes, leave your house, and go to the gym. With flossing, you have to measure out the ideal length of floss, wrap it around your fingers, and remember how much you hate flossing.

These acts seem inconsequential, but they actually inhibit us from doing the thing we know we should be doing. Sometimes even the smallest barrier is enough to sap our motivation. The thing doesn’t get done, and we feel crappy about it.

The solution, then, is to minimize barriers as much as possible, which is something Merlin and Dan talked about in episode 47 of Back to Work.

One way to reduce barriers is to choose tools that make things easier. I keep a notepad on my desk so I can quickly write things down if an idea comes to me. Likewise, I use Alfred to launch apps on my Mac, so all I have to do to open a new document is hit CMD + Space, type “b” for Byword, and hit Enter. This process is much easier than moving my mouse down to open the Finder, clicking Applications, then clicking on Byword. It makes it very easy to start writing.

You can figure out ways to do this with any activity. Laying out your workout clothes the night before, for instance, might increase your likelihood of actually exercising. You might also figure out ways to workout at home, so you eliminate the barrier of having to travel to the gym.

I get in trouble with my dentist every six months for not flossing enough, even though I know how important it is. But so far this year, I’ve flossed every day this week because of three little changes. I started using Plackers instead of regular floss because they’re easier to use. Second, — wait for it — I started flossing in the shower. I don’t know why; it just makes more sense to me as part of my shower routine. I also put the bag of Plackers on top of my towel rack, so I can’t get to my towel without moving them. This forces me to floss every time I take a shower, i.e. every day. So far, so good.

Now occasionally, if you’re like me, you’ll experience a random fit of inspiration. You’ll know exactly what you want to write, or the weather will be beautiful and you’ll want to go running, or you’ll just feel like flossin’. I get these little windows of energy from time to time, but the problem is that they’re fleeting. Sometimes I’ll wake up, see it’s a beautiful day and want to get outside and workout… but then I’ll pick up my iPad or get distracted by music or something on the Internet. By the time I break away from the distraction, the motivation is gone, and it’s lunchtime anyway. Oh, well.

The key here is to seize the spontaneity. Choose tools and methods that make your barriers as small as possible, and use any windows of energy to smash through them right away. The smaller the barrier, the less energy needed to overcome it, so you’ll be able to stop waiting for divine inspiration and start doing more of the thing you want to do.

Now, if you’ll excuse me, it’s a 50 degree January day here in Connecticut, and I have some sprints to do.

Back On the Primal Path

If you follow me on Twitter, you might be aware that I managed to eat pretty much everything in sight over the holidays. On the one hand, ‘twas the season to indulge, but on the other hand, the increased intake of my culinary vices made me feel lethargic, guilty, and more than a little gross.

I’m pleased — and my body is relieved — to report that I’ve been back on track and eating Primally for five days in a row now.

It feels fantastic.

Still, I’m not here to admonish the act of holiday feasting. On the contrary, my relatively brief foray into the realm of Christmas treats has taught me a few things about keeping a diet in perspective.

First, pigging out for over a week reminded me how much I love my normal Primal Blueprint eating regimen. Don’t get me wrong, holiday food is delicious, but so is eating Primal, and it doesn’t come with the associated bloating and guilt trips. The good news is that stepping off the path for a little while didn’t become a permanent change. In fact, I couldn’t wait to get back to my old healthy habits. That’s how a vacation should feel, and it speaks to the effectiveness of the Primal Blueprint as a sustainable lifestyle.

Second, while I did eat a lot, exercise little, and lose sight of my abdominal muscles over the holidays, the overall results of my week-long binge were… not that bad. Sure, I was a bit squishier than I was before, and my mood was a little low, but it’s not like I suddenly had fifty pounds to lose or had developed some chronic illness. I’m not saying this to condone unhealthy eating or tell you to take a week off whenever you want. Rather, it helps put the average cheat meal in perspective. I survived an entire week of holiday gluttony with pretty minor side effects. That means I should treat a single cheat meal as no big deal, rather than feel guilty about indulging with friends.

The key here, though, is not rationalizing or condoning the unhealthy meal and allowing it to become what’s normal. I would still rather eat Primal, and I will as much as I can. But, if I happen to be in a situation where it’s difficult to do so (if I’m a guest in someone’s home, for instance), I’m not going to sweat it. If I can survive an entire week of holiday eating, one cheat meal for the sake of manners won’t hurt. In the grand scheme of things, it’ll be a tiny misstep. Remember, that doesn’t mean an unhealthy meal every day won’t hurt! It’s just a way of altering your perspective so you feel less bummed out about deviating from your healthy habits. Step off, then step right back on.

Again, my holiday binge reminded me how much I love the Primal Blueprint. My sister is a recent convert, and she agrees that even after just two days back on the path, she feels so much better. I’m not trying to pimp the Primal lifestyle, as I have nothing to gain from doing so. (The gain would be all yours, actually.) These lessons can be applied to whatever diet you’re invested in. Still, if you’re interested in going Primal for the new year, Mark Sisson just put out a new updated and expanded paperback version of The Primal Blueprint. It’s inexpensive and a great way to get started.

One final note about my transition back on the path: I’ve started logging my workouts and meals using the Day One app, which allows you to journal from your iPhone, iPad, or Mac. They all stay in sync via Dropbox, and the app itself is well-designed. Keeping a record of what I do to be healthy each day helps me stay mindful as the new year progresses and the “resolution enthusiasm” wears off. I’m trying to see how many days in a row I can go without a cheat day. Of course, you don’t need an app to make this a habit. Pen and paper works too.

Why I Don't Have Comments

The Internet has been in a tizzy today about comments, so I thought I’d take the opportunity to explain why they don’t exist here.

Comments have long been a topic of debate on the web, and there are valid arguments for and against. Yesterday, Matt Gemmell wrote that his month without them was the right decision. M.G. Siegler expressed his agreement and later expanded his position. M.G. also shared this old post from Daring Fireball in which John Gruber defends his site’s no comments policy. Shortly thereafter, Cody Fink announced that MacStories is also turning off comments.

Do read those pieces; I agree with their collective position and reasoning.

I made the deliberate decision not to have comments on my site because, as Merlin Mann quoted John Gruber at their SxSW talk, “I want to own every single pixel on my site.” To do that, I can’t give everyone on the Internet the ability to anonymously post whatever they want on it.

I want to write. I don’t want to spend time moderating comments and deleting spam. The more writing I get to do, the more reading you get to do. That doesn’t mean I don’t love you and your feedback, dear reader, because I madly and passionately do. But what would be better for all involved is if you responded via Twitter, email, or writing a response on your own site.

QLE, however, is my site. It’s the online equivalent of my living room, and I am responsible for every word that appears here. By eschewing public comments in favor of the above methods, you and I can enjoy a more civil and personal interaction. In addition, you will be directly responsible for your comments, as I will be for the site’s content.

Six Months of QLE

The end of December marked the six-month anniversary for Quarter-Life Enlightenment.

Six months is not a long time, but I’m proud of what the site has become. When I first started writing back in July, I wasn’t sure how I would take to it. I liked the idea of writing a web column, and I was inspired by the many individuals who make some or all of their living writing on the web, but I wasn’t sure if my enthusiasm would last beyond the first week or two. I’m happy to say it has.

Even though the site is still in its infancy, I hope to make 2012 a big year for QLE. One of my goals is to write more original articles. I greatly admire writers like Randy Murray and Seth Godin, who publish something every day without fail. It’s something to aspire to. I find original pieces more challenging and fulfilling to write, and I hope you feel the same in reading them. Look forward to more this year.

I don’t plan to stop the shorter link posts. I think they’re beneficial, and I enjoy spreading the word about the writers who inspire me. I wouldn’t share them if I didn’t think they were worth your time. My goal continues to be to post something useful to the site Monday through Friday, whether that’s an article by me or a link to someone else.

For those of you who have been reading all along, thank you. Your support is tremendously appreciated. I hope you’ll continue to stick around and give me feedback about what you like, don’t like, and would like to see more or less of. And if something I write benefits you, please do share it with others. It’s the best way for the site to grow.

As a reminder, there are several ways to subscribe to the site so you don’t have to remember to check back every day. You could bookmark it, but you probably have a thousand bookmarks.

1. RSS. Whenever you see this icon on a website, it means “Subscribe via RSS”. RSS is very simple, but many people don’t know what it means or how it works. RSS stands for “Rich Site Summary” or “Really Simple Syndication”. Basically, it’s a way of consolidating new content from many websites into a single feed. To start using RSS, you first need a feed reader. Google Reader is one of the most popular, and it’s what I use to keep track of over 100 websites I read daily. If you have a Gmail account, you already have access to Google Reader. Just click my subscription link, hit the Google button, and choose Add to Google Reader. You can do this with any site that supports RSS. Now, instead of typing in 100 different URLs and visiting each site directly, you can just check your Google Reader as you would your email account. New posts will be there waiting for you. You can also use an RSS reader app on your computer or mobile device. NewNewsWire and Reeder are two of the best. (I use Reeder on my Mac, iPhone, and iPad. Here’s what the Mac version looks like.) For further explanation about RSS, please see What Is RSS?

2. Email. You can have the previous day’s posts emailed to you each morning. I’m working on redesigning the email template, so please stand by.

3. Twitter. Quarter-Life Enlightenment has its own Twitter account, which automatically tweets links to the latest posts. You can — and obviously should — also follow my personal account.

4. Facebook. I don’t love Facebook, but if you use it regularly, it’s a good way to get the latest QLE posts in your News Feed. If you’re on Facebook, please do Like Quarter-Life Enlightenment.

5. Google+. Occasionally, I will post an article to Google+. When there is a good solution for auto-posting to Google+, I will use it and let you know.

The choice is yours! Collect all five.

As an addendum, there’s also a Tumblr where I collect videos, links, quotes, and other things that aren’t specifically QLE-related. Please reblog liberally. Wink wink.

Thank you, again, for visiting my little corner of the Internet these past six months. I’m going to continue to show up every day, so I hope you continue reading.

I wish you all a peaceful 2012.

— Andrew

This Year, 2012

So here we are, mere hours into 2012! Feels good, doesn’t it? We’ve overeaten, come up with some last minute resolutions, and expressed pity for Dick Clark. Bring on the new year.

Like the rest of the internet, I feel compelled to write some sort of obligatory New Year’s post, even though today is virtually the same as yesterday, save for a quick turn of the calendar. Still, there’s something comforting about our annual tabula rasa, and while we shouldn’t rely on a specific date to decide it’s time to improve ourselves, it does help to have a little Gregorian push.

I’m excited for the new year. I know for a fact it’s going to be a big one, apocalypse not withstanding. This year, I’m going to get a new iPhone. This year, I’m going to finish my thesis and officially earn my master’s degree. This year, I’m going to turn 25. Quarter-life, indeed.

Yet despite the few things I do know about 2012, there is so much more I don’t and can’t possibly know. I might find a new job. I might find a new place to live. I might meet a new girl. I might meet the girl. The Dave Matthews Band might break up. People I know might get married. Someone I love might die. I might die.

And since we have no idea about any of that, I think it’s best we work to make this year a great one. On the eve of 2012, I am reminding myself that this year, I will have control over nothing. I will be given things, and I will have things taken from me. The universe will continue to expand, and I’ll continue to be an infinitesimal speck along for the ride. I am reminding myself that the only thing I do have control over is my mind, and all I can do is prepare it to accept all the wonderful and terrible things 2012 has in store.

The comforting thing is that in 365 days, I will know myself better than I do now. So will you. Each day will teach us something new, and each day we’ll grow a little more and get a little better. Each day will bring us a little closer to who we truly are. It’s going to be great, and I’m excited.

I wish you an exceptional 2012, and thank you for reading. It means the world to me.

— Andrew

How to Be Merry All Year Long

The problem with holidays is that they always end.

I don’t know about you, but as soon as Thanksgiving is over, I start looking forward to Christmas. Each December day brings more houses decorated with Christmas lights, more gift ideas, and more excitement for the big day: December 25.

All that excitement culminates on Christmas Eve, and then Christmas Day arrives at last! Presents are opened, pictures are taken, food is eaten, and everything is merry and wonderful. We go to bed feeling thankful, smiling and basking in the holiday spirit. Then, we wake up…

…and it’s December 26. Hooray.

Let’s not lie to ourselves: compared to the day before, December 26 is pretty dull. Especially when it falls on a Monday (ahem, way to go, 2011). Christmas is over. 364 shopping days left. Sigh.

I always feel a little bummed when a day I’ve been looking forward to comes to an end. There’s a feeling that the magic is over. Now it’s just another regular day. Back to reality.

I’m not here to make the case that Christmas should be a year-round event. But there’s no reason why the joy associated with Christmas isn’t something we should be able to experience all the time.

Attaching our happiness to a transitory event like Christmas is a recipe for disappointment. The fact that Christmas will come and go is inevitable, and depending on it to give us joy makes our disappointment inevitable as well. Such is the case with any anticipated event: vacations, birthdays, holidays, etc.

As I was thinking about this issue, a friend of mine tweeted about something called Gradual Christmas. When I asked her about it, she explained:

I’ve just been doing Christmas-y things for the past few days and plan to keep doing so into the weekend.

And I thought, “Well there’s the solution!” While Christmas does bring joy, who says it’s only allowed to last for one day? Who says it’s only allowed to last for one month? Why can’t we wish someone a nice day with the same enthusiasm as when we say, “Merry Christmas!”?

Being excited for the holidays is great fun, but we should not rely on them to make us feel good. Rather, we must look within ourselves to find our own sources of happiness that last no matter what day of the year it is. That way, we free ourselves from depending on temporary external events to make us happy. Those days, joyous as they may be, are fleeting. Eventually, it will always be December 26. When that day comes, we don’t want to find ourselves with low spirits.

The turn of the calendar is beyond our control, but our ability to treat every day as a special one is not. The love we feel on Christmas is something we should emanate year-round. In doing so, we’ll be able to experience bliss that lasts not just for one day, but for 365.